What Do You Want?!

I'm sensing a trend that may really harm millennials entering the workforce. No one seems to have a conceptualization of their long-term goals. We are lacking vision when our potential employers are demanding it.

The recession taught us one important thing- that we can't be too sure of ourselves. Many of us “did everything right”-- we made good grades, graduated from college, and still stumbled into a job market that didn't want us. Those of us who had it hardest learned very quickly to stop being picky. Personally, I had to beg for a job at a coffee shop in order to keep my bills paid. Minimum wage doughnut slinging is not what dreams are made of, unless you're into that sort of thing.

There is a fascinating mental default that young adults tend to share. In studies that directed twenty-somebodies to play games that force them to choose between accruing wealth or maintaining options, overwhelmingly they choose to maintain options (Check out the article here). This is a BIG problem when you are carving out your career path. Imagine paving one road that must lead directly to every home in a city. It can't be done. This cannot be done in your life, either.

As I have pursued a job, I have constantly been faced with questions about my goals. It's the first question you will be asked in any job interview- why do you want to work here? Tell me which is a better answer: 1. “I need money to make rent and your organization seems to have pretty low standards.” Or 2. “I have dedicated my educational and work life to engaging youth to get involved in their communities, and this position will allow me to utilize this knowledge and further my goal of ultimately opening a nonprofit dedicated to youth civic leadership.”

I get that you may not have a viable version of answer #2 on hand, but don't let that stop you. We really can solve this articulation problem! Truthfully, it's easy if you're willing to take some time to reflect and ponder. Here is how I have managed to form my vision:

Knowing I am worth doing something I love. The job market may not agree right away, but you need to be in a position to thrive, and you won't be until you are doing what you love.

Saying Yes! I spent a lot of time doing things that scared me. Since high school, my philosophy has been never to pass on an opportunity. I am a little more discriminating than I used to be, but that comes with increased focus and commitments. Face fear until you are fearless!

Being mindful of tasks that energize me. You probably know by now how to figure out whether you are introverted or extroverted-- do you become energized from being by yourself or with others? Bring this thinking into the various tasks you perform throughout the day. For example, I hate managing spreadsheets! But I get a ton of energy from building educational curricula because I like thinking about the learning process. Study yourself!

Thinking about how I define success. This is so important! Success is not just determined by work. Work is only 1/3 of your life. Think about the lifestyle you want and construct a life plan before you build out a career plan.

Getting strategic. Think of a big, grand movement or phenomenon that you want to be a part of, and narrow from there based on your skills and interests. Talk to people who work in relevant sectors, ask tough questions, and know that the most important thing you will bring to a movement is your passion.

And then, articulate it! Let it evolve and grow, but keep it relevant and visible. This is your life's mission statement!

Sorry to keep you waiting...

Oh, the insanity of being a grad student is catching up with me!

Sorry for failing to post for a few days (weeks). I like to think of myself as a great blogger but...

The Future Belongs to the Future Itself

Look, it grinds my gears that the government is happy to let twenty-somebodies carry the weight of other groups. This year, my state cut millions of dollars in higher education funding. Tuition is skyrocketing and no one is taking notice.

But why should government officials care what we think? Last election, only 50% of eligible millennials voted. That was actually a high point for us. This is the reality: if we don't vote, write and call our officials, and pay attention to politics, no one will care about us. 

It's not hard. I worked in a Senate office, people dumber than you call their Senators every day. 

You want to know where the funding went for higher education?     Medicare. 

Old. People. Vote. 

Reality check, y'all... 

Don't you love when 80's music is sooo right?

Habit-Forming Behavior

This post is a departure from my typical subject areas, but I simply had to share.

It's that time of year when you have officially, completely forgotten your New Year's resolution. Yet, those sundresses and bikinis are really calling to you, aren't they? It's all getting too real.

Are you trying to get into the habit of working out or eating better? I have a really simple, cheap, and easy method for building a habit that is really working for me. So, psychologists tell us that it takes 21 days to build a habit. Right now, I am trying to be more consistent with my meditation practice.

I saw this on Pinterest, and it really appealed to me because it was simple, visual, and tactile. You take those little flag tabs and number them 1-21 and then stick them to a wall. Mine says “Did I meditate today?” and each tab says “yes!” and has a number. As I rip off the tabs, I put them in a jar.

Normally when creating something like this, I would give myself an out. For example, I would make the rule that if I skipped a day, I would add two days. With this, I never thought to have an out, and halfway through, I have realized that it was better that way. Some days, I only meditate for ten minutes, and some meditations are better than others. But I make it a point to do it every day because I don't have a choice. 

Not only is it very satisfying to add little tabs to my jar, but having the tabs on the wall right across from my bed has guaranteed that I never forget. I've tried to use apps and journals and calendars, but I always forget to remember.

If you have a habit that you want to build, I recommend trying this method. It's so easy and it's really worked for me!  

As twenty-somebodies, it is vital that we build healthy habits that will enrich the rest of our lives. Please let me know if this method works for you!

A Dose of Common Sense

Here is something I have discovered about advocacy: if you constantly bring up the issues you’re passionate about, someone will point you toward the organization that fits.

During my first week with the National Conference on Citizenship (NCoC), I met a man who pointed me toward Common Sense Action, an advocacy organization for millennials. Civic engagement and twenty-somebodies? Could you think of a better fit? 

This organization is working from the grassroots to expand millennial opportunity and interest in

politics. Advocacy is built on three tiers: generational fairness, millennial mobility, and repairing politics.

CSA was founded and is run by millennials. The seven-person national staff is comprised completely of students still in college. Just over two years ago, the organization began as the brainchild of a few interns at the Bipartisan Policy Center. The organization is bipartisan, meaning it affiliates with every party without exclusion and encourages joint participation across party lines. The foundation of the organization is over twenty active college campus chapters, and its membership is comprised of affiliated chapter memberships. Additionally, mobilization focuses on primaries more directly than general elections, since low turnouts increase the impact of each millennial vote, increasing the chances that millennial-friendly candidates will represent parties in the general elections.

Work at the national level is currently centered on the recently released Agenda for Generational Equity (AGE). In terms of mobility, AGE looks at furthering equality of opportunity through reforming education access, incarceration and recidivism, and diversifying pathways to employment. Endorse the platform here!

While CSA recognizes that there are policies on the table in Congress right now that will impact their

generation in the future, they very much emphasize the need to be a viable citizen demographic in order to have political expectations. The final tenant of the platform is a call to national service, which they

believe will appeal to the millennials in a special way to galvanize other forms of citizenship like voting. NCoC shares this belief, and you can find out about their national service initiatives here.

We twenty-somebodies need a strategy for finding ourselves in the political sphere. We are lacking in civic representation and concern, making us highly vulnerable to disadvantage.  CSA is a vibrant new organization, budding with potential. In its unique way, CSA may serve a vital role in the formation of the millennial political realm, and therefore the future political culture of America. Learn more about them and get involved!

Keep Moving Forward!

Get Your Exuberance Off My Uterus

I love kids. No joke. I think they're awesome, and I love playing with Barbies and watching Fairly Odd Parents. BBBUUUTTT... I would have to get a complete personality transplant to ever want to have one.

But that's the plan, isn't it? You're born, you get an education, you get married, and you have children. It's growing up!

If that's growing up, I'll pass.

The idea of being pregnant has always been... I'll say it... disgusting to me. Not to mention the fact that... oh I don't know... it's the most painful human experience by like a million! If you aren't 190% ready to reap the reward of that torture, my opinion is the only rational choice is to opt out.

I have become increasingly outspoken about my stance in the past few years since everyone else is becoming increasingly outspoken about how worthless, weird, and evil it makes me. I have been told on two separate occasions that my life has no meaning if I don't have children. THAT MY LIFE HAS NO MEANING. What. The. What?

And don't tell me that having kids has made you a better person. I wish, for the sake of the children, that this was true, but it's not. It's complete bullshit, and here's a Ph.D. Psychologist to tell you why.

Having kids is just a choice. It's a lifestyle decision. That's it. It's not a mandatory step into adulthood. Choosing to forego children will not make your life, or relationship, incomplete.

I love the way my close friend puts it:

“People I went to high school with post things on Facebook about how they 'just didn't know how great life could be until they were a Mommy.' I try not to, but I immediately recoil a little and think, 'were you really that boring and aimless when you were just a woman? That you needed something else to validate your existence?'”

Plus, telling me I'll grow out of it is condescending. I'm not two, and this ain't thumb sucking.

Are you being a jerk to your friends and family members who don't want kids? Well, STOP! Check out this funny, but necessary article on 23 Things You Should Never Say To A Child-free Woman.