I think we need to talk about this
idea of entitlement.
Millennials find themselves deflecting accusations of entitlement by citing the philosophy of
Barney the Dinosaur, their numerous trophies for existing (everyone is honorably mentioned,
really?), and their English professors delineating the many careers you will be
prepared for with the degree. I argue that entitlement starts at home, and that
parents are largely to blame for this phenomenon. Our parents did have great
opportunities to give us everything we ever wanted. Baby Boomers have the most
buying power of any generation that’s ever existed, ever. Not to mention the
economic optimism of the 90’s, when most of us were begging for Barbie Dream Houses.
Who doesn’t want the best for their kids? It doesn’t even have to be financial.
My mother has pointed out that when she played basketball as a kid, her parents
never took her to practice or attended games. My husband, who was raised
largely by his grandparents, agreed with her. That is unthinkable in the
minivan-chauffeuring, boosters pizza-selling, helicopter-soccer-momming world
we live in today.
I say all that so I can say this…
I try to be somewhat objective about myself. I don’t like to wallow in
self-loathing or self-adoration. To take on one of the extremes is to always
find yourself up against contradicting evidence. Therefore, I declare my
entitlement to be only slightly above average (like, maybe 60%). Here is the
evidence I’m using: my mother still helps me out with my cell phone bill and is
there if I get in over my head, but I am independent to a fault, so I hate
asking for help and rarely do. I have a lot of experience in my field
that
should make me a worthy candidate for mid-level positions, but I do not expect
to be hired in as an Executive Director after college. I work my ass off for
every grade, paycheck, and reward. I don’t accept undue compliments, but I do
expect acknowledgement when I do well. I depend on my husband too much to do household chores, and I get upset if my friends aren't available for drinks. I’ve not had a hard life, but I have had
to suffer through the emotional and financial injury of lengthy unemployment. I
am lucky, and expect the opportunity to keep building good fortune. I expect
that from my government, most of all.
I don’t, however, see entitlement as
a bad thing. If my inflated sense of privilege has done anything for me, it has
made me fearless. Just yesterday I struck up a conversation with the local Arts
Commissioner about my ideas for a local program. We had an extended
conversation, and she was very supportive. Last week, I had three meetings with local non-profit staffers that I set up for no reason beyond my curiosity and to build my network. I'll take no for an answer, but I'll also rephrase the question and try again. I think our sense of entitlement
raises our floor on “the worst that can happen” and provides that extra push we
need to express ourselves and take risks. We need to use that fearlessness to be a force for good! Let's demand from our government, our society, and our experience growth, fairness, and opportunity. We deserve it.
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